party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
