I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
he high fived his dick after we had sex
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
