I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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