my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Can I color on your dick again?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.