I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.