she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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