john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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