so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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