we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
