Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
