I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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