I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize