my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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