my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
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