Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
