Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
