at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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