Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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