The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
my shit smells like andre
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
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