Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
You're like the curious george of whores
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
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