he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
