I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I want you more than these girls want KFC
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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