I cannot find my penis.
Non-Jews are for practice
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
