no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
