is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
