Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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