so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
