I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.