He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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