If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Randomize