After last night, I could never be a politician.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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