go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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