I need help removing her.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
