I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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