I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize