I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
