i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
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He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
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A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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