dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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