This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
