Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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