Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
