i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
