you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
You've changed since you got that strap on
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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