I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
