If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I don't want my vagina anymore.
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