If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
