Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize