watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
