just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
