when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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