break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
you inspire me to be a worse person
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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