i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize