So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
