Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
